Saturday, January 03, 2009

in the new year

Greetings all from the year 2009! Things are pretty much the same so far as they were in 2008, except it's pretty effing cold here, -35C last night. I'm trying to prepare for an audition on Thursday, an audition in which I not only have to converse with the AD in FRENCH, but do a cold read in FRENCH, and also sing. Fortunately, my monologue gets to be in English, which can only be considered a good thing. Hopefully our pitiful franglais emails back and forth have adequately prepared the AD for my out-of-practice conversational skills.
Also, I booked an acting gig this month, just a couple days' work for a reading, but it's nice that someone else recognizes my mad acting skillz.
Spent some time visiting the family this giftmas, which was useful in its giving me staggering insights into how my parents shaped my current personal neuroses. Fortunately, the end product of these insights was the realization that not only am I not solely responsible for my relationship with my parents, but also that how my parents choose to treat me has nothing to do with whether or not I am a good/adequate person. Match that with a side of realizing how living with intensely critical people could indeed cause me to constantly doubt myself, and I feel like I've done several year's worth of therapy over the holiday season!

Coming up this year for me:
1) Making myself heard. This vague-sounding resolution has a lot of personal resonance for me, whether it means actually pursuing singing further, writing my solo show, getting my work out there, and generally standing up more for my thoughts and beliefs.
2) Losing another 25 pounds. Which, I might add, I am NOT doing solely for the wedding.
3) Being more positive. Growing up with people who are instantly critical of the world at large has really normalized the rejection of new and exciting things for me. Which, in my line of work, is not optimal. This year, I will try to see the positive before looking for the negative.
4) Writing more. Writing every day, if need be. Doing nothing but bitch isn't really career-advancing.

Annnnd I think that's all the news that is the news so far this year. I'm just going to go work on my french, my monologue, my song, and then curl up with some tea to watch bad television.

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