Thursday, November 30, 2006

things i have noticed

i think the second most annoying song in the christmas repertoire (and by repertoire, i mean the stuff that easy listening radio plays in december) is that "marshmallow world" song. i don't even know what it's called. but i heard the holly cole version in the second cup after i went to the gym, and i wanted to jam stir sticks into my ears.
the most annoying song is "little toy train". again i have no idea who sings it, and i'm sure there are many incarnations of it. but it's freaking creepy. there's a version that they used to play on the station i listened to at work, and it sounded like it was covered by some creepy paper-skinned man who hides in closets and watches children. i suppose that would be PIN. if Pin covered this song, then that's just wrong.
i've also been thinking about pitching an MTV reality show that would basically just be me filming the people who work at my gym. it seems to be kind of like Laguna Beach or Real World behind the reception desk. always some kind of cool kid drama going on, that disappears to the back office just when it gets interesting. also, i never see any of the staff working out, but i do see them sucking back super mega lattes with syrup. or something of the like.
i've noticed that i really haven't had a lot of luck with the scene that's supposed to follow my pitch for this weekend. i have noticed that the time between now and the deadline of midnight tomorrow night isn't getting any shorter. i've noticed that i need to get off my ass and get this thing done. can't discuss any further, as one of the judges reads these ramblings.
but mostly i've noticed how awesome the DDR going on behind me in the living room is, and how i should really get some work done so i can join in the fun.

Tuesday, November 28, 2006

blog of triumph, blog of... er, triumph?

who can believe i did this? with an astounding 50,459 words of boring, grotesque, clumsy writing!
today, i rock.

in other news, it is bone-marrow freezingly cold out. and i had to go to the doctor this morning for my annual physical. the problem with my doctor is that she's always running extra late. like, you'll be escorted into the exam room and instructed by her hobbit-like assistant (i mean she seems likely to have hairy feet, not that she's neccessarily all that short) to get undressed and put on one of those weird paper gowns. and then you'll sit there in said weird paper gown for about thrity-five minutes, freezing your ass off. and eventually the doctor will make it in just as you're about to chuck it and get at least partially dressed so you can dash out and pee.
plus i guess i have to start worrying about cholesterol and bone density. god, i feel ancient. or i did, until i had to go and get some x-rays done. and everyone in the waiting room was about 142 years old. and the lady who did the x-rays was about 120. needless to say, i'm going to run out and get the calcium-added orange juice as soon as it's a little warmer out.

Monday, November 27, 2006

blog of anger, blog of shame part II

ok, i'm still pretty steamed and dismayed. watch out for whining ahead, folks. but can i just observe how astoundingly unfair life can be? how astoundingly aggravating it is that i feel so inadequate, and how no one cares about my inadequacy? and how somehow that makes me feel more inadequate?
so i'm thinking of going to winnipeg instead. and, failing that, saskatoon. i think the closing dates for those are pretty much separated enough that i can find out about one before having to submit for the other.
but, the inevitable doubt creeps in. i'll have to take a different show, and have no idea what that would be. it seems like i might be doing it largely by myself, which is scary. and no one here will care. which is astoundingly aggravating.
isn't it odd the thing that drives me crazy in others (the short-sightedness of yearning for local fame while ignoring the bigger picture) is so prevalent in me? still wanting to be in the cool crowd?
oooooh i just feel so INADEQUATE.

blog of anger, blog of shame

ok, so i just returned from the frozen outside after spending a delightful 90 minutes at the fringe lottery. suffice it to say that i was drawn at number 42 ON THE WAITING LIST. so, barring some horrible bus accident or multiple lightening strike, i'm not going to be doing the fringe. again.
and it pisses me off. as 2 years of not doing anything for the fringe has shown me, my phone isn't exactly going to be ringing off the hook with offers. i'm guaranteed not to work unless i cast myself.
well, that may be a little melodramatic.
but i am feeling self-pitying and have caught a cold from my many travel adventures today. so i'm entitled. also, i missed the doctor phil heroin house because i was at the lottery.
i could always do a byov, i suppose. but those seem like a lot of trouble for very little payoff.

Sunday, November 26, 2006

how cold is it?

it's easily -4000000 degrees outside at the moment. that, or approaching 0 Kelvin (hahaha wink wink nudge nudge to all you science nerds out there). currently i can't see out my window due to what i can only assume is (a)yet another snowstorm, or (b)radioactive death fog that will mutate all who breathe it in. one of those.
so, i am at 45000 words now, feeling pretty damn comfortable with that. and tonight heading out to see part deux of the lamest theatre community controversy ever. i had to correspond with the big B last night, and i innocently asked if i would see him there. who knows who will show up? maybe no one will show up. maybe everyone will show up to sneer. in any case, some kind of shit better go down. or else i should get picked to move on to the next round. because it's waaaaaaaay too cold to venture out without some kind of payoff, be it gossip or glory.
so i have a job interview tomorrow. which is somewhat laughable. do i want to work at the mall? as in, be an administrator who works at the mall? the engineering secretary or whatever it is? one of those behind-the-scenes people who bring the mall to you? one of those things i applied for on the spur of the moment, yet do not want. yet, my eagerness to impress perfect strangers makes it difficult for me to throw an interview.
also, i joined a book club. eep. will this be a fiasco a la columbia house tape club? (curse you, soup dragons cassette i did not order!) i couldn't resist. it was free cookbooks. and then they send you a catalogue of more cookbook. and then you just have to avoid having them send you their monthly selection. so easy! so yummy! i have baking books coming!
mmmm french toast is almost ready.
ETA: i almost forgot the thing that is bugging me the most. my mouse has now officially crapped out. well, perhaps unofficially, because it still does a half-assed job if you repeatedly slam it down on the pad and yell at it. but you have to watch the swearing, because that seems to cause the bottom to fall out, and the little ball inside to roll away. i can't say i ever realized that a mouse is supposed to come apart like that. nor did i realize that some will spend upwards of $150 on a new mouse. not me. i'm looking in the $14-25 range. nothing but the best for my computer.

Friday, November 24, 2006

so this is my writing warmup

strange how the closer i get to my goal, the less motivated i feel... oh, i'm sure an analyst would have a field day with that one. anyway, this is my writing warmup as i attempt to close the gap between me and 42K words tonight. I'm already at 41K, so i'm not anticipating too many problems. plus i've applied to the fringe, sent in my pitch to wwt, and have a lame job interview on monday. i've paid my bills, i got my roots touched up. i treated myself to a massage. i bought some new jeans. i feel so... productive. i've even been to the gym this week. so things are really on track. except that it's minus 1 billion degrees here, things are going swimmingly.
there's no way that my "novel" will be actually finished when i hit 50,000 words. it's one of those things that is randomly smashed together and has no real end. so i suppose it will be finished when i type "the end".
now all i have to do is some christmas shopping. (speaking of ambivalence...)
okay, off to hit 42K. sorry the blog just isn't very interesting as of late. i promise more excitement when the new year begins.

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

i'm feeling like a bit of a lazy bum...

not that i'm sitting around watching tv all day. although i do like my stories, can't forget to watch days of our lives every day. or every other day. or even every six months, trust me, you'll still be able to follow the story. (if there are any old-school days people reading, you should tune in... as many of the original actors are back once more, they've been running flashback scenes from the early 80's, which is truly hilarious. also, perhaps you can explain why steve remembered that deaf kid he took care of, but fails to remember kayla. does anyone remember that deaf kid? the kid that forced the actors to learn sign language, and so after that, many, many characters on days were temporarily deaf? oh, i could go on.)
anyway, today i am at 27K words on my novel, hoping to get to 30 by tomorrow. and i'm probably going to start on a pair of (hopefully) kick-ass yoga pants made out of a t-shirt i bought at the value village 50% off sale. (madness, do not go, as you will be shoved by many angry ladies who bear a passing resemblance to the michelin man).
i do feel lazy, however, as i have not gone to the gym in some time. the past couple of days i can pass it off on my stupid knee, which currently resembles a large red bocce ball in the middle of my leg. but, it's not like i'm bedridden. well, perhaps mentally.
but today is DAY FOUR of nonsmoking. i have to say that i am not constantly thinking about how much i would love to have a ciggie anymore. although, i do find myself reaching for them without thinking about it. if memory serves me correctly, this is about when the guilty smoking dreams should start.
that is about all that's new. doing lots of things, but accomplishing relatively little.

Saturday, November 11, 2006

who's down with OPP?

and by OPP, of course i mean the Oriental Party Pack of frozen hors d'oeuvres, available at your local Safeway. not only is the OPP a cornucopia of asian Oriental delicacies, the ease of preparation will surely leave you in a lip-smacking, salt-induced grease coma for days to come. and when you wake up, you'll be sure to have a friend in gut rot.
of course, this is all a part of my grand tradition of making a meal out of canapes, going all the way back to the bacon-wrapped cheese sausages that will surely make my arteries the talk of the cardiology unit.
as you can see, i haven't updated in a while. i suppose i've stopped procrastinating and have been hard at work on what some would loosely define as a novel for Nano. and today i am proud to announce that i'm up to the 20,000+ mark! astounding!
the other news of the day is that we just purchased Spongebob Monopoly, as there were no Simpsons games available at crappy Bonnie Doon any of the fine stores we visited. we think this will stave off nicotine-deprived violence while we attempt to quit smoking forever... this particular project begins tomorrow. negotiations are still underway to determine whether or not the "last" cigarette is to be consumed at midnight tonight or first thing tomorrow.
we had started to play a game tonight, but it's just been ruined by a giant cat invading the town and destroying my slowly growing empire.
oh, the humanity.

Wednesday, November 01, 2006

don't you hate it when...

you go to a halloween party where you don't really know anyone, and even if you did know people they're all wearing fantastical masks and makeup, and it's really hard to recognize people? and then you hang out with some people you do know in a back room, and you get mildly high from all the pot smoke? and then you make your way through the drunk people carrying pumpkins and yelling about scotch, and get home safely only to find that when you wake up you have a horribly misshapen eye, possibly due to some random skin allergy and the cheap drugstore false eyelashes you were wearing? and then you start your nanowrimo novel and you get about 1800 words into it, before realizing that writing fiction is HARD and you seem to have adapted to writing only dialogue and you've forgotten how to DESCRIBE?
don't you hate that?
also, when you haven't figured out the direction your blog should go in, so you continue its ongoing theme about whining about your life?
don't you hate that?
i do, however have to say... 1800 words! in only 1.5 hours?! WTF?
it's a little easier when you realize that you're the only one who never has to read it.