Friday, May 31, 2013

Oh where oh where have I been?

Well, I was in another city for 3 weeks doing a workshop. I was also doing some auditions, which were "successful" but not "SUCCESSFUL" if you understand my meaning. I have another audition coming up on Monday which not only involves singing and acting, but also the dreaded MOVEMENT CALL. I think it's basically a dance call for non-dancers, which I would ordinarily get really stressed about, but I think I'm such a terrible non-dancer that all I can do is laugh and try to do my best. I will endeavor to throw in some "dancer face", you know, the serious and intense looks of realness that people have in Fame or music videos.

The workshop was really interesting-- working with 12 other people plus the facilitators in a group setting was... challenging at times. There are definitely some people for whom I wish nothing but the best, and fervently wish never to work with them again. I was a stupendously bad judge of character for the first time in recent memory and ignored the signs of someone who turned out to be, quite literally, insane. (Of course, in retrospect, I have a little Usual Suspects moment, where all the warning signs and clues fall into place in a rapid montage.)

A couple of things... I had some miserable days there, where I really, really struggled. But even those days were about 1 million percent better than sitting back here at a desk job, by virtue of actually getting to go to work every day in a theatre. I got to try and fail, and try and succeed many times. A few people asked me if I did musicals because they thought I was a good enough singer that I must do that. They seemed surprised when I said I didn't, due to overwhelming fear of public singing. I was reminded that the most important thing is to do the work that you want to do, however long it takes to get there.

I have a new project that I'm working on. I can't really articulate it very well, but that tends to be how all my projects start. If I can explain every detail at the outset, it means I've already figured it all out, and it will quickly cease to become interesting to me. It's still anxiety-provoking because I don't know what it will be, or if it will be any good... which is a lot of pressure to put on something I've barely started. I know, I know. Stop thinking about end product.

Easier said than done.... but I guess I should go practice moving so I'm ready for Monday.