excerpts of a conversation between two guys on my bus, who i later discovered live in my building

"you know what it should be called--it should be called the Institute for Wild Pasts and Morally Reprehensible Decisions"

"That's where your drunk friend comes in."

"And then dude bites me on the shoulderblade."

"It's not like we're in officially committed relationships. Not really."

"So... do we shake it or glaze it?"